the feel good four

Just Listen.

In this moment i'm excited. 

In this moment, I am a lot of things.

Work today was a blessing, I loved...the very end of it.

Do you ever find that the things that you enjoy most in life are the things you don't think you want to do? 

After Jordan and I kicked butt in the dish room, we were both reeeeally ready to get out of there. Then, I remembered I told a resident I would stop bye and visit with her before I left. You know, I hate to admit this, but I really had the thought in my head "oh, maybe she forgot I said something..." 

shame on me. 

On my way to clock out I hear "Hey, you want to push me?" Another resident was dragging herself along the railing trying to find something to do, like always! She's always begging people to push her around, talking to her is actually the high light of my day. She has the freaking cutest voice. If it wasn't against the law, I would record her singing and put it on here. I clocked out, walked back out into the hall and started pushing her around. I asked her about her day and what she wanted to get into tonight, and she just sang to me. "Lay that pistol down, babe. Lay that pistol down." 

I just let her sing and pushed her around in circles until she stopped singing. We stopped at a table and I pulled up to chair to sit with her for a minute. She grabbed my wish bone necklace off my neck and closed her eyes while it was still grasped in her wrinkly hands. She sighed and told me "My husband used to make lots of jewelry. Of course he's dead now, but I sure do miss him. I miss him in the morning, at lunch, and of course at supper time." She told me stories abut diamonds and dancing. Oh, she loveeed to dance. And now she just lingers around the place looking for someone who will take a few minutes to push her around in her wheelchair.

I finally got to the other residents room. She was sitting at her desk by her lamp doing cross word puzzles. Her orthopedic socks and gummy smile was such a great thing to see.. I sat on her bed and she told me about her oldest grandson in Nebraska and about her newest great-grand baby who visited her yesterday. She pointed out this picture on the wall of her old roommate, "she had 11 children. Of course, her husband wasn't worth a green penny, but she was worth 11 children." ...whatever that really means...

Then she pulled a stool over, made me sit down on it, and she brushed my hair. "Good God your hair is red!" That made me laugh. While she was brushing my hair and I was about to be put to sleep, she told me all about her church family and her pastor and her...

(are you gonna kiss me or not? just came on my pandora. I had to stop and smile. Just pretend i'm singing this to you. I will NEVER hear this song again without thinking about you and that car ride.)

...other old lady friends. I just let her talk. I was getting my hair brushed, I didn't have a dang thing to say.

I wondered if what I was doing was legal. I'm pretty sure it was, but I never saw anyone else getting their hair brushed. Oh well.

After a while, a CNA came in to take her into the bath room. 

I had one more stop to make before I left. 

Right next door lives a woman who I say good-bye to every day.

Today she told me she thinks of me just like one of her own. But, the sad thing is, her own don't even speak to her. She's a tough cookie! I was happy to hear that I had another grandma to add to the list. She also hates my red hair. She told me "Dear Lord, Please wash your hair again tonight. You should probably wash it twice." I just laughed.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's moments like these that make me sure of what I want to do for the rest of my life.

I don't ever want to be too busy, I don't ever want to stop caring. 

The feeling that I get when these women open up to me and tell me their life stories...amazing. 

Some people never stop giving.

I pray every day that I will never lose sight of the passion. 

They just want to love you, they just want to love something. 

They want something a little out of the ordinary. 

A little surprise,

a push around the nursing home, a head to brush, a hand to hold. 

I want to be that for them.