I'm almost to the inner part of Atlanta when a Taylor Swift comes on. Man, that Taylor Swift. She certainly knows how to tug at those heart strings. Anyway, this song is about growing up. There's one part where Taylor says "Memorize how it sounds when you're dad comes home, the footsteps and the sounds made.." This made me think back to when I was little. I used to hide in my room until I heard that faint sound of his old '87 Ford Ranger coming down the gravel road, the sound of the gate opening, the dogs parking, doors opening and shutting, the 2 steps up the stairs into the house.."I'm Home!" I already knew he was home before he had to say anything...I remember how comforting these sounds were, but I never realized how comforting they were until they weren't there anymore. Growing up.
Yers before now, I could never picture myself doing the things that i'm doing today. Having this freedom can sometimes be scary. Where am I going to be five years from now? How will I feel about this then? There I was driving my car 500 miles from North Carolina to Florida, no directions, just instinct. I remember first getting my license and having to rethink every turn I made. Now, I can make a nine hour car ride with no problems. Growing up.
My 22-year-old brother graduated from High School on this day.
On this day, he felt proud of himself, we are all proud of him.
Sometimes it takes longer for people to grow up, sometimes people will never grow up...
Sometimes people grow up too fast. What happens then?
At his graduation, I saw people that I walked those halls of high school with. Those four years didn't seem to mean anything, I was just a face in the crowd. I'm fighting for smiles or at least eye contact---nothing.
Why do we hold onto things that don't matter? I guess i'm just silly to think that going to school for four years together makes you friends automatically. Boy, I am wrong. Little do you know, she's still holding onto that one time in 10th grade when you called her out in front of her friends. Growing up.
I love how as you get older, your parents develop this raw honesty with you. For instance, my mom. She's never been the expressive type, but now that i'm older, she doesn't keep anything from me. I still want to be her little girl, I don't really want to hear about her love life. I don't really want to know what you're doing instead of your sons graduation dinner. I don't really want that honesty. I miss when you ask your parents where babies come from and they make up some stork story. I understand there is a time and place for everything, like the exact truth. But sometimes, it's not always necessary. Growing up.
A friend and I were talking the other day about letting go of things. Or, maybe just knowing what to expect from things. I think that a part of getting older means knowing what to expect before it's expected. For example, you have a friend who is always late to everything. She asks to meet you at the movies, you know she's going to be late, even though she sets up the time..I feel like when you're younger you expect every time to be different. So, you don't expect her to be late, but when she is, you're really surprised. As we get older, we aren't surprised by the expected anymore. It's just...expected. Growing up.
"Wasn't it beautiful when you believed in everything?"
One Day by: Matisyahu
Anyway, Just some thoughts for today.
